Our local paper, The Lytham St Annes Express – and I’m not providing a link because it’s such a useless publication – recently saw fit to splash a large photo of Abi Titmuss on the front page. The reason was, apparently, that she might – note the conditional – make a visit to Lytham. The article then goes on about the burgeoning celebrity culture in Lytham, brought about by its trendy bars and restaurants. The list of celebrities is awe-inspiring: apart from La Titmuss, there’s Phil Vickery, Andrew Ridgeley, Britt Ekland…and, er, that’s it. Just run that by me again, will you? So that’s a man who’s married to a fat lady on the telly, the uncreative half of a pop duo that broke up twenty years ago, and a woman whose main claim to fame is that she used to be married to Peter Sellers. I’m all agog. Truly, Lytham is the new St Tropez…

CC BY-SA 4.0 Celeb mania by Dr Rob Spence is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License.